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TestimonialsHere are some testimonials, things people have said about me and my counseling methods and this website (I apologize, but for privacy and confidentiality reasons I cannot display anybody's actual names): First about working with me: "You have been such a wonderful help. I don’t know how to thank you properly. Debby, you have a wonderful heart and you have restored my lacking hope in mankind as a whole over these past couple of weeks. I have dealt with therapists and psychologists much over my life due to my own demons from abuse. It is nice to know that professionals care as much as the survivors like myself do. “We saw someone two years ago. He didn’t make one suggestion. Thank you Dr. Deb. In this one session, you’ve helped more than numerous other sessions with other therapists.” “We never went to therapy before. The perception I had was that you speak and the therapist just listens. What I enjoy is your interactions. You help people reach conclusions. You have unique opinions that are very refreshing.” "You have turned my husband around - he's kind, sensitive, asks me how I feel - You're amazing! Dr Deb, after only 2 sessions of phone counseling with you my friends have noticed a difference in me I can't tell you how much this means to me" “I think there’s a hypnotic power in you! When I leave your office I feel I can attack a mountain! That’s the effectiveness of your treatment.” “Counseling with you is like a lightbulb moment every time. You have already produced positive changes.” “With DrDeb’s insight and guidance I was able to transform my life!” “We need more people like you in the world.” “One reason I feel so comfortable working with you is that you tell us stuff about yourself. To know that you’re human too, helps me.” “Now things are going very well. You helped me see how my addiction was a manifestation of my low self esteem. I was running away, copping out.” “Communication between my wife and me is significantly enhanced and her communication with her mom is very much better. Between us there is more passion and appreciation for each other.” “You saved my life by managing my case properly. Deb—you’re good!” DrDeb,
When doing phone caunseling with you, you were very helpful,
understanding and unlike many others, you were understanding of my financial situation
and did not act greedy. I wanted to let you know that words cannot describe what you have done
for our family, the change, the joy, the calm. Each and everyone of us feels a tremendous uplifting and are excited to
live again. My thought everyday is how to get other people with similar problems to know of your work and achievements to be able to help them as well. Your approach is very different than any other. Others have said that in an abusive relationship nothing helps, well we have news for them! The process is not an easy one, however it is worth every moment, every effort and much more. We have received our lives back and I thank you dearly for that. Coming here, the thing I appreciate most is learning to convey how I feel.
You made an excellent suggestion last week: Every time I find myself not listening to her, I should tell her how much I appreciate her. That helped a lot. Well, this week, she cancelled the attorney and put her ring back on. I actually want to walk on eggshells to make sure to be in tune with what my wife needs. In the past, when she would grumble, I'd just grumble back. You were there for us. We wouldn't have gotten this far without your help. I found all the sessions helpful to recognize her needs and understand the dynamics of the relationship better. On the other hand, I realized I needed to set clearer boundaries myself, not just make her happy and give in to her fears. The exercises were very useful. My husband is doing really good and I'm doing really good. He is hurt, yes (because I was talking to another man for a year), but I think we're getting there.I think he understands his part of the problem and he's trying to rectify it. My feeling is--I love him and I think our future together is going to be a good one. My fiance has shown such a remarkable difference in his few sessions with you. He's more sensitive, aware of his own behavior, including things he says that are hurtful. He thinks about them and then comes back and apologizes; it's not a quick "I'm sorry" just to get rid of me. He accepts what he's done wrong. I was very surprised, in fact, amazed. Since I came here, you took the fear of him away from me. I don't care about what he will do, now. I do what I need to do for me. I don't want to be afraid of him, but if I am, I will call the police, now. You woke me up. This is how strong I'm becoming: Two weeks ago, I had a fight with my brother-in-law (my sister's brother) who treats her the same way my husband was treating me.We were talking about my sister who wants to get a divorce. For 17 years, I saw the abuse and kept quiet. But on this day, I said to him, "You're the same as my husband; that's why when I came to you, frightened, you never helped me. Today, you are not going to hurt my sister any more." He explained that when I used to come to him, he didn't want to get involved. I cried when he said that. "You're a monster!" I told him. What kind of person are you to not want to help?" I guess I was upset, crying, so he said, "You're crazy," and I said, "No, NOW, I'm healthy." I told him, "You've hurt your children. They came to me crying." The 16 year old wants to run away. He said, "You're lying." I said, "No, and if something happens to them, it will be on you." After a while, he came back to me and apologized and said he was sorry. I told him, "Maybe God sent me to you to wake you up." DrDeb, you woke me up. I had been shut down, but now I'm me again. I'm happy." Here are what people are saying about this website and the newsletters:Hi Dr. Deb, I think your web site may have contributed to my wife to put off the divorce for now. Thank you so much for providing all this info on your site. This is our situation, I have a problem controlling my anger, which had resulted in me verbally abusing my wife w/o even knowing it at 1st. She says it's like I have two different personalities, one she's in love with and the other she's afraid of. I think I made significant changes in how I express my anger. Thanks again for your help. Your website alone is a great inspiration and I look forward to continuing to learn from it. Thanks again, your kindness has really meant a lot! Take care! M Dear Dr. Deb,
Dear Dr. Deb, Dear Debby, You have a clear "voice" on your webpage for the Registry. I wish more
therapists knew how to communicate quickly who they are and who they like to work with.
It's great to have you on board. I like the way you write your articles. You put things in a simple perspective that
can be related to in everyday life. After reading your articles I look back through my
life to see if anything that you said fit into the way I live my life. If I notice
similar patterns I try and follow your advise to make the necessary changes. I also
asked my fiancée what she feels are the top five things that she would like to see me
work on to make me a better person and to build a healthy relationship. I also like
the way you show how a person became the way they are. Most of the books and articles
that I have read from other authors seem to be one sided. Some chapters are
interesting, but I usually find myself putting the book down as I feel they are not
helping me understand. It seems as though most authors/therapist lean toward telling
the victim to leave the relationship; that the perpetrator will never change. I feel
that is untrue in many cases as people truly do want to change their behavior and will
work at it endlessly. Hi, Thank you for the newsletter. It came at a time when I was so desperate for advice as to how to handle a man who is now out of control with his abuse and irrational thoughts. He has accused me of everthing under the sun that it is now so ridiculous, insane and almost comical. He has really lost the plot He talks loudly in order to drown my voice that I usually have to abandon the conversation. He is so worried about being found out that he is fighting back desperately and not relenting. In fact now that I'm not supporting his behaviour, the verbal abuse is becoming so obvious. Hi is losing control of me. But i do so appreciate the newletter because it's pointing me to the right direction. I will now build my self esteem up and see if time will be kind to us. Can you send the issue of Dr Debbs newsletter on Self v. Selfishness. I missed it and would like to read it. Excellent article on - The Line Between Giving and Giving Up Yourself. From a mental/verbal abuser - You rock and have helped save my marriage! I love your website and
related articles. Extremly informatiive and so on point! The information in your newsletters have clearly shown me that I am in a relationship
that is both emotionally and mentally abusive. In learning more about abuse sadly, I
recognized that I have begun to abuse him also. At this very moment I am making
preparations to leave.
your information is
right on--the "professional" marriage counselors had no idea what I was telling them
about psychological abuse- either they were badly trained, lazy or afraid to confront
my wife, or all of the above--do you put on seminars--this would be a great topic for
people in Denver--it seems to be a silent epidemic in marriages---thanks for your
time. Hello I anxiously await your newsletters every month. You
have helped me save oir marriage when none else had faith. Thank you! I also got your book and still am reading it. Thanks
i wanted to drop a line and say that I look forward to reading your newsletter. I'm
enjoying it....its informative, not too much info and a quick read.
Read about my book on ending verbal abuse Read more about marriage counseling Read about my book on parenting
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